'Mumtobe' shared her story on Nairaland:
My friend has been married for a year now. Although during the courtship I warned her about her husband. That everybody knows him as a chronic flirt. They were both in different states. But she still went ahead. And now they are married and she has been miserable since the first day of the wedding.
My eyes saw the unspeakable on their wedding day. In fact the husband is so immature and proud. No respect for her family. And he displayed it on the wedding day. Well I kept mute cos he didn't disappoint me in the character aspect as I heard they were already married and what God has joined together let no one put asunder. That was when my friend began to regret the marriage but it was late.
Fast forward to two months after the wedding, the husband started keeping women outside d home. My friend couldn't tell anyone but she confided in me. I tried to encourage her. Now it's has turned to the worst.
My friend travelled for a while for treatment and the husband wouldn't call and for days. When she calls, his phone was usually busy sometimes and he won't call back. The next morning she calls and he will bluntly say he was asleep or tired.
then during Easter they travelled down to their hometown, then she noticed some changes. Out of curiosity, she checked his phone. My friend got the shocker of her life. He has been travelling to meet his girlfrnd in another state and other girls. He sends them money, he doesn't call his wife pet names but called the girlfriend all kinds of pet names. And he really downgraded my friend in the chat, that her sex was so disappointing and even went ahead to laugh at his wife that she wasnt virgin when he met her and a virgin was even better.
He was referred his wife as "that girl" to his mistress. The girl never forced him to marry her.He was the one that told her he will marry her. This is some one that do ask the guy how her intimacy life is and he would say it us fine by him. When it comes to hygiene I rate my friend 9/10. We schooled and served together.
She confronted her husbad. He could not apologize instead he blamed her for going through his phone. And says she is a baby. You knew she was a baby and still married her. That she doesn't act her age. I know that is wrong. My friend is so mature even by the way she handles his infidelity. When the reverse is the case. How can you claim to love a woman and then you downgrade her. Everyday you make cry and yet he passes by like the she means nothing.
Imagine they had a huge fight now night and in d process. He hit her. She was upset and called her mum and told he mum about his infidelity, the husband replied and said d prostitutes are better than her. My friend called me the next morning and was crying. I live far from her so I couldn't visit her recently, she told me about the frequent night calls he makes while he is in d parlour and she was in d bed. She decided to trace the call through the help of a friend. Got the number, lo and behold it's the same mistress which she found out sometime ago.
She told me sometimes she may just need cuddling and not intimacy at night and he will just ignore her. No hugs, no kisses, no play time as couples. My ears have heard a lot.whenever I call her she sounds depressed and most times break down in tears over the phone. Sometimes she pings me and tell me she is depressed.I knew her ex and they were perfect just that parents were not in support of the relationship.
She told me this morning she was tired of the marriage. I tried to encourage her that he may stay. But on a second thought. Why will u be unhappy in a marriage and decide to stay while the unrepentant cheat is happy with the other women. The worst is that he doesn't even care and is quick to tell her she can leave. I know the guy in question well and he comes from a single parent-home so he doesn't know what it means to be a family. This hurt me. Other people warned her about this. What pains are more is that she had to fight to ensure he was accepted by her family and now the person she fought for has turned her to a filth.
I still keep asking her what drew you closer to this guy in the first place. Her reply was that wheneva she came to visit and probably makes a mistake in the cooking, that he corrects her nicely and made her laugh with jokes. And she wasn't aware of his cheating skills.that she thought people were just talking. Now d scales are off and things are upside down.
I forgot to add this. The husband thinks as long as he provides for her and the family, she should not complain when he keeps his mistress. sad shocked I know marriage isn't a bed full of roses. Am married as well but my husband doesn't disrespect me d way he does to her. This should also serve as a warning to the single. Please know ur spouses well before you say "I do". Your future happiness depends on that decison. Please advice my bestie because she is depressed. Ways to handle a cheating partner. I am dropping off now cause I need head for home from work..
